The Book -- Chapter Summaries
Chapter 29: Just Like Your Father

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Chapter 1: Considering Divorce
Chapter 2: Whom Do You Tell, and Why?
Chapter 3: Reassuring the Children
Chapter 4: Telling the Children
Chapter 5: Buying Presents, Buying Love
Chapter 6: Children Blaming Themselves for the Divorce
Chapter 7: Short Visits
Chapter 8: Creating a Schedule
Chapter 9: Handovers
Chapter 10: Transitions
Chapter 11: Telephoning Home
Chapter 12: Why Not on Thursdays?
Chapter 13: Staying in Touch
Chapter 14: Sharing Dad's Bed
Chapter 15: Two Birthday Parties
Chapter 16: Moving from the Family Home
Chapter 17: Grandparents
Chapter 18: Playing Messenger
Chapter 19: Keeping Secrets from Parents
Chapter 20: Therapists
Chapter 21: Last-Minute Cancellations
Chapter 22: Reading the Agreement
Chapter 23: Individual Time
Chapter 24: Assuming New Responsibilities
Chapter 25: Sleep-Over at Dad's
Chapter 26: Gender Stereotypes
Chapter 27: Fiscal Responsibilities
Chapter 28: Introducing the Significant Other
Chapter 29: Just Like Your Father
Chapter 30: Refusing to Spend Time with a Parent
Chapter 31: Adolescent Dating Anxiety
Chapter 32: The Disappearing Parent?
Chapter 33: Long-Distance Parenting

In which Ted, age eleven, wonders whether Mom is right that he is as worthless as his father.

Being compared to a person your parent despises is never a positive experience. When that person is your other parent, it sets up multiple loyalty issues. Ted is both angry at his mom for failing to see his positive attributes and at his father for having so many shortcomings. Tempting as it is to compare your children with the absent parent, the commentary speaks to the harm it does to the child's self-esteem and both parent-child relationships.

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